Motherhood is messy. Now, that’s quite an understatement. Motherhood is not only literally messy (diapers, spit-up, toys, crafts, etc.), but it’s figuratively messy, too. Mothers have such strong emotions when it comes to parenting their children. There’s so much love, but also frustration and sometimes anger. There is some unwritten rule that we have to be “perfect” moms. And then, when we aren’t, there’s the guilt that comes with it. On top of our own guilt and feelings about our parenting, we have these mom shamers in the world that just love to point out our flaws. I mean, come on, mamas. We all need to lift each other up. We’re already hard enough on ourselves, we don’t need help.
Being a mom is freaking hard. Like the hardest thing you’ll ever do. There is this tiny little human that relies on you for all of their care every hour of the day. They snuggle and love the closeness. Then, they start to grow up and they’re 20 months old, looking you straight in the face, yelling “No! No, Mama!,” because you asked them to put pants on. Like, really? And I don’t have experience beyond the 20-month-old mark, but it doesn’t get easier, or so I’ve been told.
So how does motherhood get easier?
There are a few things that can be done to make motherhood a little easier. I will do my best to help with them.
Find Your Village
You’ve probably heard the saying that it takes a village to raise a child. Well, this statement is so accurate. Mamas need a support system to lift them up when they face challenges. It’s easier to deal with the hard stuff when you can share it with someone else. It is so important to Find Your Person.
Your family and friends make up your village. They should love and support you. But if you don’t have a couple mom friends that “get it,” you need to find some. Sometimes you just need to call that person and say, “ugh, my kid is being such an a** today!” and not feel judged. Where do you find these friends? Well, that becomes a little more challenging. As a stay-at-home mom, I don’t have a lot of opportunities to meet other moms, unless I seek them out. That is hard for me because I’m a bit of an introvert but I’m getting better at it.
In your local area, find a library program for children the same age as your children. Those mamas in that group will likely be having similar challenges. Some areas even have stay-at-home mom groups that plan outings once or twice each week. You could find some mama friends in Facebook groups. Yes, I know that sounds a little crazy, but there are plenty of FB groups out there that you will likely fit into. I’m in a cloth diapering group, a Montessori for toddlers group, and another mom life group, among being in some mom blogger groups. I’m not best friends with any of the people in these groups, but I can visit the group and share my successes and frustrations and feel safe knowing that they are a like-minded group of people.
Another awesome place to meet other mamas is at conventions and events geared toward moms and families. My favorite event is MommyCon, which is all things natural parenting. I can meet tons of cloth diapering, babywearing, breastfeeding mamas! I’m even in a MommyCon discussion group with other mamas. You can read all about why I love MommyCon in THIS post. There may be parenting events local to you, so search for them. Build your village. You’ll be glad you did.
My goal with this blog is to be that person for those who need it. I want to help other mamas deal with the messes and stresses of motherhood. I’ll share my experiences and the experiences of others in the hope that mamas can relate, provide support and a safe place to share (vent) when motherhood gets tough, and do whatever I can to make life just a little bit easier, by providing simple activities, self-care ideas, and parenting and home management tips.
Whether you’re a working mama or stay-at-home mama, finding simple activities to keep your kiddos busy is a must. When I say simple, I mean, less than five materials (I prefer two or three). With a toddler, the easier the better. I share a lot of activities on the blog that are relatively simple and keep little ones occupied. I also find a lot of great things on Pinterest. You don’t have to do big, elaborate activities with your children. They care more about the time spent with you and the attention you give them, so make it easy.
My simple Halloween craft was a HUGE hit! It was an adorable “BOO” Handprint Craft. Another simple and fun activity for kids is playing with felt. I created an awesome Felt Board Activities roundup post with links to some wonderful other bloggers! If you haven’t made your child a felt board yet, follow this easy DIY Felt Board post. It’s really simple and can provide hours of play.
Self-Care for Motherhood
Parenting becomes easier when you begin to take care of yourself, as well as your family. If you always put everyone else first, you wear yourself down. When I don’t take a few minutes for myself during the day, I’m grumpier and feel exhausted. Self-care doesn’t have to take a lot of time, cost money, or be elaborate. Wake up five minutes earlier to enjoy your cup of coffee or tea alone. Or spend a few minutes each day writing in a journal. Don’t make self-care hard. Just start incorporating it into your daily routine. You’ll be glad you did.
If you need help getting into a self-care routine, you can take the 28 Day Self-Care Challenge for Moms. There’s a free printable included that gives you one self-care idea each day for 28 days. Print it off, hang it on your mirror, and take care of you, Mama.
Don’t reinvent the wheel if you don’t have to. Seek information and ask for advice when you need it. As a new mom, I didn’t really want anyone to share their advice with me, UNLESS I had asked for it. I wanted to figure things out on my own and if I needed help, I searched for the information. Did everything I tried work for me? No. Will something that worked for me always work for you? Nope, but it might point you in the right direction or give you another idea about what might work.
Here at Live Love Mess, I only share my experiences. Some things I tried worked great and others didn’t. And the way I do things isn’t necessarily the “right” way for someone else. Every single parent has their own way of doing things. All I ask is that everyone is treated with respect and kindness. I only share my parenting tips to help make motherhood a little less difficult for those that need it.
Home Management Tips
Every once in awhile, I’ll share a post about running or organizing my home. Oftentimes, I try to include a checklist or printable that I’ve created to make my life a little easier, so I can make your life easier, too. Parenting is hard enough and then we throw running a household on top of that. It can be a lot. When I share home management tips, they are things I’m doing (or attempting to do) to make things run a little more smoothly at my house. The ideas are meant to help other mamas who may be struggling with the same things I am. The tips I give might not work for everyone, but they may spark an idea that will be successful.
My most loved home management post is 5 Tricks to a Tidier Home. It’s a great post with five simple things you can do to have a cleaner house. Be sure to check it out!
Motherhood is the Best Mess
Good luck on your journey! Ask for help when you need it! Always feel free to reach out to me if you need something. I am more than willing to help in any way I can.